Within the past year or so, the global shipping industry has been all but crippled by the scourge of pirates (the lame Somali type, sadly). After last month's dramatic USS Maersk Alabama rescue, the world's commercial fleet has been living in fear of scary men with machine guns (and of course, they just HAVE to be black...)
But need not worry, freighter captains of the world! Former Presidential hopeful, Republican Congressman and YouTube sensation Ron Paul (R-TX) has a rootin'-tootin' Marshall plan for disinfecting the international waters of these vermin.
It's called marque and reprisal. It's a nifty little Constitutional tidbit that enables the federal government to hire private citizens to patrol hostile territory. So, in a nutshell, Ron Paul is calling for Government-approved mercenaries to combat maritime pirates.
Sounds like a job for Blackwater! Or at least for MORMON JESUS.
Anywho, this could be serious business for all the burgeoning Dog: Bounty Hunters out there. Just think: gone are the pirates, done away by trigger-happy Southern successionists with nasty arsenals and even nastier hairstyles. I feel safer already.
So, thank you in advance, Dr. Paul. By the way, good luck with that I.R.S. thing...
this blog is silly and this post proves it. (not that the rest of these blog posts aren't silly)
ReplyDeleteyou're lucky i care enough to comment on it.
First of all, Ron Paul is a brilliant man. he would have made a far better president than either McCain with his arm candy VP or the talk box we have for a president now.
As far as the privateer idea goes I don't really understand why it's such a bad idea.
Privateers help defend Britain from the Spanish Armada and were used in this country during the revolution in place of a navy which didn't exist yet. Seeing as how it takes 3-7 years for anything to get done in our government I think the use of privateers is a great idea.